The Asian Welder

203.365

“A thought that apprehends its object through a generic, or mental image.”

Geshe Kelsang Gyatso

taken at a local hospital in wait while a dear friend under went countless tests, to determine the cause and symptoms of pain.  suffering is pervasive in this environ…within the walls of a hospital there is much to witness and observe of the human condition. some people look healthy and yet sit with IV’s attached to them, others look terribly ill and lay on gurneys sleeping or with clear expressions of bewilderment or fear.  it is not a place one would expect to find peace or serenity of and in the mind, yet i did experience moments of peace and calm…because of my friend.

with each sharp pain my friend embraced i winced…she asked me to lead her into a meditation to relax…because of her strength she gave me strength. because of her acceptance with her body and its physical limitations i found patience. because of her asking for my help i found compassion. even under heavy sedation she spoke with kindness to EVERYONE, while i had to be mindful not to run out of the room and and yell at someone anyone to help or pay attention damn it..now! “can’t you see this is not working, can’t you see she is in pain, can’t you see she needs help…?”  i don’t know if the meditation helped her but it did help me!

at one point i was the one whom had to administer liquid for a particular scan she needed to have done. the liquid smelled nasty and when i asked her what it tasted like she said “lemonade made with a rotten lemon!”  i was given strict instructions for her to consume within 30 minutes…ok, i am not a nurse by trade but i am a mother so i told myself this is only medicine she needs.  what neither of us realized was she had an allergy to this concoction!  she became more and more distraught and ill, and now i felt like i was administering poison…in effect it was for her body!  long story short, she survived  after her body expelled it forcefully. what keeps going thru my mind though is how strong our survival instincts are. how much capacity we have to change. how precious this human life is.  how fragile our bodies truly are. AND never enter a hospital without an advocate by your side!

i drove her home around 9pm, a full day of pain, suffering, praying, crying, laughing, meditating….life.

in the lineage of Buddhism i study and practice under we call this “samsara”, an uninterrupted rebirth without freedom or control, characterized by suffering and dissatisfaction…life in this world today as we know it.